Hard choice to me

The time will show myself and all in my mind. I have to show what I feel. I haven't a heart, yes, it will be your mouth-voice to me all time. I receive it and I will be a reason that I’m a worth-wrong in this association. Sure, I believe it will be.

The false situated in me. I presented when my heart doesn’t in this association. We say it by “niat”, My niat to walk by this association was decrease after the incident that happened at the past. I was a weak-man. I wasn’t loyal-person like as you thought. I just a person that always make a broken-heart to people arround me. I belief it and I felt it friends, but I always be confused by myself to think a out-way from this complicated-troubling

I’m sorry guys, you were a people that I hurted with my bad character. I’m a confused person everywhere and everytime, at the campus, at the office, at the environtment and all. I don’t know yet, it’s about my self that never you knew. 

Everytime has gone so fast. My inspiration, my motivation and my special person that always give me a great words has gone into the next life with a sweet-condition. I’m the one person that in sadness everytime. I knew some his secrets fact that always make him sad and thinking-more and I bring his secrets-fact into my life now and try to solve it but still cannot be solved all. Some of his secrets-fact also speak about an association that I joined. It’s a reason of decreasing spirit in me for the association but I still confuse to find the right-answer. I’m sorry, I’m sorry, and I’m so sorry to all people that I hurted because of my false-way that occur because my-own-self.  

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Then, I just can blame me and decide my way is go back into my religion. It’s the right way that I believe now although I know that my islamic-quality isn’t strong and good enough but I still in struggling, striving and trying to grow it to be better. I’m sorry friends. I cannot be a good and loyal person in the association. 

Quote:

“You must make a decision that you are going to move on. It wont happen automatically. You will have to rise up and say, ‘I don’t care how hard this is, I don’t care how disappointed I am, I’m not going to let this get the best of me. I’m moving on with my life.” - Joel Osteen 

-Alim-